Sunday, March 11, 2007

A little late-night crazy never hurt anyone. It's not catching.

Why is it that I'm most hyperactive at night? I want to work on a zine, I want to cut my hair, I want to type an Octavio Paz poem and tape it to a random person's door. I want to watch "Keeping up Appearances" on YouTube, I want to write a poem of my own. I want to clean my room, I want to bring a revolution of love and laughter to the world. I want to believe in my own power, I want to cry, I want not to deal with the fact that daylight savings time begins today, I want to finish my paper, I want to post instructions on how to kick would-be date rapists in the balls on the door of every women's restroom stall on campus. I want to learn to write with fewer clunky prepositional phrases. I want to sing arias until my throat hurts. I want to make a T-shirt that says, "I'm on my period," then wear it, and see if people try not to piss me off. I want to learn Spanish. I want to listen to the news in German, and see if my listening skills are still sharp. I want to know whether or not I got into medical school. I want to know why 14 states are having to cut funding for children's health care, while the war in Iraq and Afghanistan is still in full swing and sucking up billions of dollars. I want to know why we bomb instead of calm, why we kill instead of chill. No, I haven't been taking drugs.

I want you to know that I love you. You know who you are.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Me, my sophomore year, looking pensive...a few months after my first stint in treatment.

And so, appropriately, we have some sophomoric lyrics (courtesy of elliott smith)

pretty (ugly before)

sunshine, been keeping me up for days

there is no night time, it's only a passing phase
and i feel pretty, pretty enough for you

i felt so ugly before, i didn't know what to do
sometimes is all i feel up to now

is it destruction that you require to feel
like somebody wants you, someone that's more for real
sunshine, been keeping me up for days
there is no night time, only a passing phase
and i'll feel pretty, another hour or two...

This is how I'm feeling now. Cautiously optimistic. Pretty damn good, despite being sick. And while I may not feel pretty (oh so pretty) I can tolerate myself, even like myself at times. A step in the right direction, at least, and not at all easy considering the wider culture of college-aged body-obsessed insanity (not to mention American society in general).

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Crazy Christian Links

Yes, I'm a Christian. But what I am not is a fundamentalist. What kind of Christian are you? Here's how you can tell...a quick and easy quiz, from me to you with love. In the fundamentalist spirit, I've narrowed the choices down to two. Because there are two kinds of people in the world...those who love Jesus, and those who don't. (For the record, I'm kidding).

1. A woman has the right to choose...
a) her brand of laundry detergent
b) what happens to her body

2. Children should be
a) seen, but not heard. And if they're heard, they should be beaten.
b) loved and respected as whole human beings.

3. Gays are
a) the spawn of Satan, sent to earth to tempt God-fearing evangelical pastors into sin
b) um, people, like everyone else.

4. The Bible is
a) the infallible and direct word of God.
b) a book of holy scripture, but one written by humans, with the attendant possibility of mistakes

5. President Bush is
a) an inspiration
b)an aggravation

6. I prefer the
a) Old Testament, now with 50% more smiting action!
b) the New Testament, with its message of love and atonement

If you voted mostly A, congratulations! You're an evangelical Christian, like nearly half of the United States of America.
If you voted mostly B, you're a Unitarian, a mainstream Protestant, a Catholic, or maybe even a Quaker. You might as well just call yourself a secular humanist and be done with it.

SO...on to the links.

Jack Chick Publications This man is well-nigh insane. He has gospel tracts on subjects ranging from the evils of Catholicism (there's a tract on the Eucharist called "The Death Cookie" that you HAVE to read), why a healthy Israel is necessary for precipitating the Rapture, why homosexuality is a one-way ticket to hell (multiple tracts about this, including a hilarious one called "Doom Town"). Some of these will make you laugh, while some are tear-jerkers. Others just piss me off. Take a look at it and see what you think.

Brio Magazine I had a subscription to this when I was in elementary and middle school. It's an evangelical magazine for teen girls. "Ask Susie" (the advice column) and the articles about dating are especially fun. If by fun you mean slightly disturbing (which I do).

Breakaway Magazine is the equivalent of Brio, but for teenage guys. Look at the articles about dating here, too. There's one about how kissing before marriage can lead to a breakup when your girlfriend "no longer trusts you." Intriguing.

More to come...