Monday, April 23, 2007

Interesting. Recent cuts in the Department of Justice's budget have hit hard--the inmates have apparently been reduced to wearing clothing generously donated by the Petite Dominatrix Bargain Barn. And yet the money was there last year, when breast implants were made an obligatory part of the prisoner uniform...notice how the woman in the front is not actually holding onto the bars with her left hand. Her breathing is restricted, and she's a little dizzy on account of the oxygen deprivation. The woman in the back appears to be sucking in as much air as she can, too...oh, wait. Sorry, that's a Marlboro Red she's working on. Last time she got a day pass, she snuck an entire carton back in her cleavage.

For a novel about libidinous artists, the cover art is appalling. Perhaps the folks at Spartan Publishing blew the money they were supposed to pay the cover artist on vodka martinis and coke. Or perhaps they gave the Stoli and blow to the artist, and the resultant perversion (pun gratuitously intended) of all sense of proportion and perspective is what we see before us now. Also: I hope the redhead (who has the most highly arched brows I've ever seen outside a John Waters movie) didn't spend too much time on her bouffant, 'cause it's going to get TOTALLY WRECKED by her friend with the oddly receding hairline. IT'S LESBIAN PULP FICTION MONDAY!!! If you hadn't already guessed.

Women's barracks, eh? Maybe I should joing the Army...although I have to say, those pink bras don't look strictly regulation to me. And to the woman on the upper right: perhaps it's not the best idea to have a lit cigarette dangling from your lips as you lounge lustfully in your lingerie. It's all fun and games until someone has to have skin grafts, or loses a nipple.
Disclaimer and obligatory liberal guilt: I am reclaiming these images, not condoning them. I am not intending to objectify anyone; on the contrary, but pointing out the rank absurdity of such images, I hope to get people thinking about the stupidity of the modern equivalents: everything from Motorola ads featuring gratuitously naked sylphs to Maxim to the hard-core objectification of women in publications like Playboy et al.

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